One-third of workers play hooky

A co-worker read this article in CNN News and told me my list was better.
http://www.cnn.com/2009/LIVING/worklife/01/26/cb.playing.hooky/index.html
I started the list some 5 years ago when I kept over-hearing some ludicrous reasons for not working. Almost all of these items listed are factual reasons, most not admitted during the fact but after the fact, for not working or leaving early:

1. I can't make in to work today; I ate bad sushi last night.
2. I am unable to work from home since my domain password has to be renewed from the network.
3. I accidentally drank a beer at lunch that activated a health condition that keeps me from working in the afternoon.
4. I am stuck in the elevator and can't get out ... HELP!!!
5. I emailed yesterday that I would be sick today. Maybe the Spam filter deleted my email?
6. I have a cable installation appointment at home today.
7. I have Federal and Civil jury during this week.
8. I couldn't call in sick due to phone technicalities/defects (dam VOIP router).
9. I am too tired from building my child's 800 piece play set.
10. I was locked out of the network after trying to log in three times, so I will rest for the next 8 hours until my access is restored.
11. I went to the midnight showing of Star Wars with the other geeks.
12. I couldn't access the building due to the nearby construction blocking off access.
13. I can't work efficiently due to my laptop being sick with a virus.
14. I am at Macy's purchasing slacks so I am not violating the new company dress code.
15. I am stuck at home waiting for a pickup.
16. I am unable to work today due to a head trauma associated with a failed black belt karate move I attempted to perform against my cinder block instructor.
17. Hurricane Ivan, Dennis, Emily, David, Andrew, etc. is too near for me to work today.
18. I went to lunch and ordered the special which had an hour prep time on top of the usual 30 minute wait, not enough time left in the afternoon to work.
19. I drank very HOT Cuban coffee too fast, must go home to heal burnt throat.
20. Paint and glue fumes from nearby office construction has given be a blinding headache.
21. I spent all night in line waiting for the newest Harry Potter novel.
22. I had to go to emergency room when the bottom of the door was jammed into my big toe while I was trying to open it.
23. I have to study for my 3rd attempt at my CCNE course or I will have to reimburse the company for all expenses accrued.
24. I have a 5 day reservist function that I must attend.
25. I submitted my days off request to my previous manager before the recent org change.
26. I am working from home until my computer is reformatted due to the slight administration removal of the “everyone” group that has access to my computer.
27. I am unsure where and whom I report to due to the latest undisclosed organization change.
28. I cannot find a parking space. Even the non-parking spaces are taken, must work remotely.
29. I accidentally ate food fried in peanut oil and I am highly allergic to peanuts.
30. My living area had a water main leak which forced me to change my place of living.
31. Some fast-and-furious thief stole the hood of my car.
32. I broke my leg while playing a basketball game sponsored by the company.
33. I received 4 bills from AT&T for a phone, cell phone and broadband service that I never purchased. I needed to spend the rest of the day as a private investigator realizing that I am a victim of identity fraud.
34. I tore a large gap in my pants while moving a server.
35. Someone jumped in front of a train, had to wait for the tracks to clear.
36. I am at home celebrating my boss being fired.
37. The metro train broke down while in transit, had to sit and wait for repair.
38. My daughter was born 2 months early and I need to extend my Christmas vacation another week (this was my last entry).